


borderlands one shots

by rottenstrawberrymilk



Category: Borderlands (Video Games)
Genre: Affection, Aftercare, Angry Sex, Blow Jobs, Desk Sex, Drabble, Drabble Collection, Dubious Consent, Established Relationship, F/M, Friends With Benefits, Gentleness, Hair-pulling, Hate Sex, Licking, NSFW, One Shot, One Shot Collection, Other, Power Imbalance, Reader-Insert, Size Difference, Size Kink, Smut, Wall Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-28
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:28:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22934083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rottenstrawberrymilk/pseuds/rottenstrawberrymilk
Summary: borderlands characters x reader nsfw
Relationships: Brick (Borderlands)/Reader, Brick(Borderlands)/You, Handsome Jack (Borderlands)/Reader, Handsome Jack (Borderlands)/You
Kudos: 60





	1. hatefuck

handsome jack

nsfw 

* * *

A deep sort of dread weighed down your stomach on your way to Handsome Jack's office. You fucking hated him. Every day you prayed you'd wake up to the news of Jack finally being murdered. But it never happened. It felt like it never would. He was infinite. He was everything. And he wasn't going down or anywhere for a long, long time.

Whenever Jack asked for you, you knew how it would end. Every single fucking time. But you came back every single fucking time for more. You hated his guts but God did you love him all up in yours. Every time it was a game of power between the two of you. Obviously a very delusional one--anyone with half a brain knew who had actual power. It was a tireless game. Ended once the two of you separated and restarted the minute you bitterly entered his office or wherever he wanted to meet with you at that time.

"You're late, honey," was all he said when you slammed open the door to his office. You crossed your arms and kicked the door shut hard enough to make him look up. You fixed him with your smoldering (E/C) gaze, ignoring the bubble of fear rising into your chest. He was so fucking unpredictable, God knew what he'd do. Everything you did was taking a risk. Everything.

You swallowed. "I wasn't expecting you to want me today. I thought you'd leave me alone in favor of that new secretary. What number are you on now? Twenty six?"

Jack shrugged, resting his cheek on his hand with a shit eating grin. "Hey, I gave 'em a choice when they didn't wanna cooperate with me. I told them they could quit or..." He slowly stretched his arm up, revealing the gun holstered at his side. "Well, you know well enough what the other option is. You've had my gun at your head a lot lately haven't you, cupcake? You're lucky I don't get sick of you and pull the trigger. You've been awful to me lately..." 

The corner of your lip twitched with disgust. "It's nothing you don't deserve, you dick-" you started before Jack suddenly stood up. He fixed you with a challenging stare, like he was saying _go ahead, finish that fucking sentence._ You weren't up for playing around with your life at stake today. You cleared your throat. "Anyways, I thought you called because you had a position finally open for me. So I can start paying off the debt you like to remind me of so much?" 

"Aww, it's so nice to think about how much you need me," he purred, approaching you from the desk. 

_No, not today._

"I don't need you at all," you told him as you backed away from him. He didn't stop taking steps forwards and red flags went off in your head. You didn't like the road this situation was going down, but you'd been down it before time and time again. The familiarity of it should have been more comforting to you. "I...I just don't fucking need you okay," you suddenly found yourself repeating, crossing your arms tighter as your back hit the wall and you let your posture slouch just slightly. "I want to genuinely get to work. So I can pay you and go home."

Jack scoffed. “You're cute...without me you’d would have been dead. I _saved_ your life. And I think us continuing our little shenanigans would be a _great_ way to pay me back, kitten, especially because you owe me so much...” His hands were at your waist, his thumbs pushing under your pants slowly. "You're still completely in debt to me. And I mean _literally_ in debt, God even after all the times I paid you for a quick fuck, your bank account is really--and I mean _really_ \-- depressing to look at-"  
  
Your eyes narrowed as his fingers traveled lower, tracing slowly over your skin. You did your best not to let him in, not to let him see the cracks in your armor. “Very cool! Nice gaslighting! Except here’s the thing Jack—I’ll fuck _you_ when _I_ feel like it. And right now, I’m not feeling it. So,” you leaned forwards, gritting your teeth, forcing each emphasized word out slowly through them. “ _Step. The fuck. Off._ “

Jack couldn’t tell whether it was chills or cold fury that ran down his spine as your venomous words reached his ears. His eyes narrowed. He squeezed your hips tightly, leaning closer to your face, so close his nose was only an inch or two away from yours.  
  
“Here’s the thing pumpkin-- I’m the most powerful goddamn man in this entire fuckin' galaxy. When I want somethin',” he chuckled before his face darkened and his fingernails dug into your skin. “I _always_ get it. I’m not taking no for an answer.”

You scowled at him, your own fury evident in your brows and clenching fists. You went to grab his wrists and angrily pull his hands off your body. He held steady to your frustration. Jack's lips came close to yours and you bashed your head against his, barely thinking. His hands left your body but to your surprise he didn't move back.   
  
“ _Fuck_." His hand went to his head and he sucked in air through bared teeth, looking like he was close to snapping and straight up fucking beating you to death right then and there. His sudden change of tone and obvious arousal came unexpectedly and you didn't know what to do as he spoke again, his voice lower. "You’re so _fucking_ hot when you’re mad. I bet after I’m done fucking you senseless you’ll do your sexy little angry walk out the door too, won’t you? Like you always do...” One of his hands suddenly slid down your leg, grasping at your thigh before he violently yanked it up, looping it over his waist.

His other hand went directly to the small of your back, slowly sliding down further until he had a handful of you. 

“Be a good girl for me, huh, cupcake?” He smirked. He loved pushing and prodding at you until he sent you over the edge. He knew you’d explode and in a fit of unchecked emotion, give him exactly what he wanted, more fiery than any other hot chick in the entire station.

Your lips twisted into a snarl. “Oh I’ll show you ‘good girl’,” you hissed, suddenly grabbing fistfuls of his shirt.

He released your leg as you practically pushed him back into his desk. Articles cane crashing off his desk as you crushed him into it, your heart pounding in your chest and blood racing. He laid over top of it as he kissed you, ignoring your teeth against his bottom lip and wrapping his arms around you so you were on top of him. Your grip tightened at his shirt as your lips moved with his. As much as you hated him you always found perfect rhythm with him—with every move of his body. The smell of him filled your nose as he pulled away from your lips and went for your neck—his favorite place. A soft groan escaped you as you tilted your head back, exposing more of your neck to him. Jack but down sharply and you let out a pained cry before slapping him upside the head.

He grabbed your wrist tightly, practically crushing it in his grip. “Oh you’ll pay for that, baby,” He seethed out.

Using his weight against you, he rolled over on top of you, taking your place and forcing you down against the wood of his desk. You could feel the hard bulge in his pants as his hips grounded against yours, his hands grabbing fistfuls of your hair. 

“Get the fuck off me!” You snapped at him, struggling beneath him.

He kissed the corner of his lips, his tongue flashing over your skin as he grinned, his eyes alight with crazed lust. “You don’t really want that, kitten. I know you, better than anyone. You want me right on fucking top of you. You always do. You want me more than I want you—fucking you senseless, huh?”

”You son of a bitch,” you hissed back, fighting to get back on top of him. He released your wrist, his hand going back to your ass and squeezing tightly as he kissed you roughly again, his eyes half shut in bliss.

Somehow the two of you ended up on the ground. Jack let out a grunt as his back hit the floor, his lips leaving yours, giving you a chance to breathe. His hand moved from your ass and to your waist and his other left your back. He reached for your pants, yanking then down in almost a maddened way. He hooked your underwear with an index finger, yanking it to the side like usual. Flustered, your own hands reached for the button and zipper of his jeans, fumbling at them.

Jack didn’t seem to notice or care as he heatedly kissed you once again. His lips trailed down to your throat again before he reached down and started to lift the hem of your shirt. You yanked the rest of it off on your own. His hands grasped your cheeks, keeping your head where he wanted it to be as he went to kiss you again. You jerked your head out of his grip stubbornly. 

His deeper groans drowned out your own as your fingers thrust through his hair, grabbing on tightly, instead keeping his head in place as you began to leave an aggressive trail of love bite down his throat, matching your own, if not being more prominent. As you sucked on his skin, he pushed down his trousers more before rolling back over on top of you. Your hands left his hair and went under his shirt. An elongated moan escaped you as his fingers ran over your crotch teasingly. Your nails dug into his back as his hips ground against yours.

Jack, being the fucking asshole he was, stretched out the process as long as he could, bringing you close to ecstasy before denying you it—his way of controlling you, making you beg for it. When you eventually broke the fourth time around and gave him, you screamed his name again and again.

”I need you, Jack,” you had cried out, as he pressed your head against his chest, practically drowning you in his musk. He let you ride out your climax before you fell limp against his chest, gasping.

For a moment the two of you laid there, legs intertwined, the smell of each other’s sweat blending together, the heat of your bodies building. You shut your eyes for a second, feeling drained as always. His thumb brushed over your shoulder blade and you quickly readjusted yourself. You removed your body from his, no hint of happiness on your face as you stood up and wriggled back into your pants.

”Going so soon, sweet cheeks?” asked jack, sitting up on the floor, his hair a disheveled mess of silver streaks and brunette locks. 

“We’re done here,” was all you said shortly, pulling your shirt off the floor and quickly putting it back on, giving a half assed attempt at smoothing out the wrinkles.

Jack stood up, leaning on his desk, his pants pulled up but his zipper and button still undone so they hung loosely at his hips. 

“Don’t be late next time,” he said to you with a wink. “Every minute counts, baby.”

You scowled at him. No matter what you did you knew deep down he’s never let you go free. You were too good of a fuck for him to lose. Too fun of a toy. Your fists clenched once again. 

“Same time, next week?” Handsome Jack called out mockingly as you stormed towards the office door.

”Whatever,” was your only response, dripping with hatred.


	2. care

brick

nsfw

* * *

Ever since you'd broken some ribs in an unfortunate explosion (thanks to some bandits, obviously), you'd been pretty much out of action in every way possible. At first, your boyfriend, Brick, didn't mind it. He actually liked it. With you on bedrest for the next few months, healing with the help of Dr. Zed, he didn't have to worry about you. If it were up to him, at first, he would have kept you like that forever. Safe and easy. 

However, what he didn't count on later on was that there were very little ways he could...physically express himself to you without hurting you. You spent the first few weeks constantly doped up on painkillers or sleeping, and he wasn't the type to ever take advantage of you like that. Usually, he'd wait by your bedside, his hand over yours, watching you slide in and out of consciousness. Soon, your painkiller dosages were lessened and you were able to actually talk to him and use your idiot brain all the way. 

You told him often about how much you missed going out there into the wastelands with him. You often told him of how you longed for him, of how you missed _him_. You could feel that he was just as frustrated about the whole situation as you were. For once, Brick's immense size was doing no favors for either of you. 

But, the two of you, being idiots together, still tried to find ways to get through it. You'd normally end up too tired or achey to actually go through with anything past kissing or some slight touching. 

Brick was pretty much up the wall wild after three months. 

Eventually, you couldn't take it anymore either. Zed had told you you'd needed another month or two to fully heal. You decided that you felt pretty fine and thus invited Brick onto your tiny ass bed for a good time--the first in months. 

Unfortunately, you were kinda wrong. It'd been going great at first. Just the usual--his lips on yours, his weight on you, making you feel all helpless and bothered. And then came the pain.

“Careful, careful,” you hissed. “Ow, fuck, Brick-“ You went to squirm out from underneath him.

  
His hands tightened stubbornly on you, rendering your efforts in vain. You shoved, hard against his chest, uttering another few pained curses before he got the message. His weight lessened on you as he stood up off you, looking frustrated as hell.  
  
“What?” he snapped.  
  
“I’m too sore. My ribs aren’t healed all the way so right now you’re just...too much on a bed. We gotta find a different way-“  
  
“Okay listen, I’ve wanted to get on top of you for _weeks_ now-“  
  
“Yeah, you can still top you big dummy but we need to just...just try a different way to do it. Like, maybe...”  
  
Brick followed your gaze to the wall. His blue eyes met yours as you raised your eyebrows, a smug smile twisting your lips slightly. You tilted your head to the side, just a fraction. That was all it took.  
  
Brick’s hands easily lifted you from the cot. He carried you like you were weightless, a thrill that set ice flowing through your veins and helped you instantly forget your irritation. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, your lips on his. He pushed you up against the wall somewhat harshly, the desperation and arousal obvious. Quickly, you wrapped your legs around his waist. One of his hands found the small of your back, covering it almost completely, arching your form to fit against his body.  
  
“Now fuck me like you mean it,” you whispered harshly to him.  
  
A low groan was your only response from him. The noise thrummed through his broad chest against your own. His free hand brushed down to the oversized t-shirt clinging to your body. You unwrapped one of your arms from his neck and reached down as well to help, pulling your underwear to the side, guiding his fingers, a stifled, shaking sigh leaving your lips.  
  
His name graced your lips many times, louder than the last with each moan. It was ecstasy on his ears, his lips pressed against your exposed neck, biting and sucking hard wherever he could, aware of every little flinch and tremble he caused. Your hand gripped at his tank top tightly, your jaw clenched.  
  
Eventually, when you could take no more, your hand swept down from his chest to his trousers. He’d already undone the belt his first attempt at basically fucking you hard into your sheets. The button was undone as well and the zipper was down. He was hard against your soft hand. Another cold thrill made its way down your body, making you shake against him.  
  
“I wanna-” he growled to you from between his teeth as you stroked down him slowly, unable to keep your fingers steady.  
  
Your cheek was against his chest—he’d let you sink lower for easier access and comfort. You’d lifted your head slightly as his hand, slick with you, joined your own hand. You eyes met his.  
  
“Then do it,” you’d demanded, your voice barely more than a ghost of a whisper. There was more intensity in it than Brick had ever known.  
  
It took him a few tries but he finally manage to line up with you, slowly pushing up against you. He knew how you liked it—how you could take him. Slow at first. That was the most difficult part. You’d cried your first time with him, which he still felt infinitely bad about, but Brick’s guilt was forgotten when he saw the look of pure pleasure on your face. Brick bumped you back up a few inches so your arms were around his shoulders again as he began to thrust. His hand was still tight on the small of your back, securing you safely against him.  
  
You weren’t even able to cry out his name anymore. Only soft, long moans escaped you, muffled slightly as you buried your face into his chest, your teeth clenched, as you tried to hold on as long as you could. Each one encouraged him on, as he became more fierce and aggressive. His chest heaved against you as your ached your nails into his rough, scarred skin. Beads of sweat gathered on his forehead as a low groan escaped him and he pushed you up and down against the wall.  
  
Brick was edging closer and he knew for a fact that you weren’t going to be able to hold on for much longer at this rate. His free hand shifted up to your throat, slowly, before coming to your chin, lifting your head so you could look up at him. God he was close and the look in your eyes wasn’t helping. Like you never wanted him more in your life than in that moment, like you never needed anyone more than him.  
  
He watched you bite back a scream of ecstasy as you visibly stiffened against him and around him. He choked back a groan. Brick thrust his head forward to kiss you hard, both his hands going to your cheeks as you seized against him, climaxing hard. Your moan muffled against his lips was his new favorite sound. He followed suit only a few moments later.  
  
A heavy, satisfied sigh left you as he pulled out, panting. You shut your eyes, feeling as though you were going to pass out against him at any moment. You blinked back the tears from your eyes. Brick wrapped a strong, scarred arm across your back, keeping you secure as he hiked his trousers back up, just barely covering him. He gently repositioned your underwear, and pulled the oversized t-shirt down lower to cover you.  
  
Brick pulled you from the wall, his other arm pushing up under your shaking legs. He knew that normally you couldn’t even stand after fucking like this. You were limp in his arms, maybe on the verge of falling asleep.  
  
Slowly, he settled down in your cot, something he knew damn well he couldn’t fit in. Normally his head ended up at a weird angle and he had to stick one of his legs out of the cot. But Brick didn’t care. You breathed out a happy sigh, feeling him beneath you, your arms still snug around his neck. Your cheek was against his chest and rose and fell with every deep breath he took. It took him a few minutes to actually get the air back in his lungs. His large hand rubbed over your back slowly.  
  
“...that was...really good,” you murmured to him, your eyes still shut. “I think I needed that.”  
  
Softly, his chest moved beneath you in a bit of a chuckle, a bit of a smirk on his scarred lips. “Yeah?” he responded. Brick’s hand moved up to your slightly sticky neck, brushing the hair off of it and to the side so the cool air of the base could reach your skin.  
  
“...you don’t have to stay here with me. Your neck’s gonna get all fucked up.”  
  
“Don’t care,” Brick muttered back to you, shifting beneath you slightly. His hand shifted down your back and to your ass, giving it a bit of a squeeze.  
  
You rolled your eyes. You wanted to scold him but you knew there was no point. He was stubborn and once he decided he wanted to be somewhere—he was gonna stay.  
  
But maybe this time you didn’t care either.


	3. just for you

brick

nsfw

* * *

A frustrated sigh left you as you brought your hands to either side of your face, bouncing your leg slightly, anxiously.

You’d been bent over, checking out some of the maps and charts all over the table. You'd been attempting to track down a particularly sly bandit for a few months now per request of someone who'd posted on the bounty board. Every time you managed to pinpoint his location, by the time you showed up to the camp, he'd get alerted and disappear into the hordes of psychos running around. Apparently he was a thief--a good one at that--and carrying some pretty invaluable loot that you'd loved to have get your fair share of.

"You know if you just let me help you with that bandit scum, I bet we could catch him easy," came Brick's voice from behind you. He must have just gotten back from running a few errands of his own. 

"Back already?" you asked. You were aware that Brick's missions tended to run a little short on the account of him fucking obliterating anything in sight. He was a powerful ally and you couldn't have counted the number of times you found yourself relieved that he was working with the Raiders again. 

"Always busy when you're workin' with the Crimson Raiders," he said, setting something that sounded heavy down as he drew closer to you. "Now are you gonna let me help you with that skaglick or not?" 

You scoffed. "And split the loot? Too good of a bag, sorry Brick, it's all me this time around. Doubt there's much you can do to help me anyways...this dude's hella slick..." You let out a sigh. "Four times. This is the _fourth_ fucking time he's gotten away." You folded your arms over the map, putting your weight on the table entirely with another sigh.

Brick snorted in amusement. "Who said I wanted loot as payment? Maybe I want somethin' else..." 

A bit of a smile slipped onto your face as your fingers arched gently atop the maps laid down. You two were the only ones in the base at the moment. Roland and Lilith were off investigating some threat and Mordecai was down at Moxxi's last time you checked, probably drowning in liquor. And it _had_ been ages since you'd had any time alone with Brick.

You didn't really label what the two of you had. Yeah, you fucked him a lot, but you were still allowed to have your little crushes here and there on Moxxi and maybe flirt with Dr. Zed from time to time. And Brick tended to flirt with Mordecai as well. You'd never felt any sort of jealousy about it, so you figured he was equally fine with not putting a label on what he had with you as well. 

Fuck buddies--you'd go with that. Secret fuck buddies to make it even more fun, although you were sure the other Crimson Raiders were starting to catch on to both of your antics.

He leaned over you, his hard chest to your back, grabbing along your waist and up to your chest, slowly. You could feel him hard against your leg and a heated blush suddenly overtook your face. You were almost kind of flattered to know you turned him on this quick. Clearly, he'd been thinking about you on the way back from his mission. Still, you figured you'd spice things up this time and turn the tables on him. Your frustration from your failed outing was enough to encourage you into feeling a bit more dominant today.

Suddenly, you turned in his bruised arms, pushing him down into the chair behind him. Well, at least he let you push him anyways. Brick looked amused and pleasantly surprised at your sudden desire to take initiative before he did. His scarred eyebrow raised as you dropped to your knees, your hands pressing up his thighs. You fingers went to his trademark belt buckle as you looked up at him, finding nothing but excitement and a sort of puppy-like adoration in his eyes. 

He really did love you in his own way--you knew that.

The sound of his zipper being yanked down was clean in the air, between your heated breaths. Just seeing the bulge in his pants was enough to get you all hot and bothered as well, if not more than you already were. One of his huge hands reached down to aid you. You smacked it away, giving him a glare and a huffy exhale. 

"I can do it by myself," you snapped. 

He held up both of his hands, the scars on his palms visible. "Alright, alright, whatever you want, baby," he said with an obvious grin. God him and his stupid, dumb smile.

You rolled your eyes and continued on, slowing your pace slightly, making sure you didn't look too frantic. You wanted him to beg for you and you wanted it bad. It was his turn anyways, you'd been on your back just last week screaming for him, hands against the back of his head. 

Your soft fingers stroked over his cock slowly, running over his shaft and to his tip. He leaned back, jaw tight as he let out a low groan, accompanied by your name. You felt fire in your stomach at his voice. 

_Holy mother of fuck,_ was all you could think, partly in response to your name on his scarred lips but also in reaction to just how fucking _huge_ he was. Would he even fit in your mouth? You'd made him fit in other places before so you figured why not. 

Gently, you licked a long, slow stripe up his manhood and to the sensitive tip. A slight tremor that he wasn't able to stomp out ran visibly though him. He reached down again, this time pushing his fingers through your hair, gathering the locks at the back of your head as he prepared. Brick had the good sense not to push at your head, and let you take your own time. You opened your mouth, experimenting at first. You weren't able to go that far before you could practically feel him at the back of your throat. What you couldn't get into your mouth, you wrapped your hands around, beginning to pump slowly. His fingers tightened in your hair, but he remained gentle, letting you still have most of the control. At least for now. There was always a point where Brick snapped and couldn’t control himself any longer.  
  
That was usually your favorite part. And God did you fully intend to work him up to that as hard as you could.

You would have been super focused on doing so if your hair didn't keep shifting in front of your face. You stopped momentarily, pushing back your hair again, growing increasingly annoyed with it. A bit of embarrassment made your skin feel hot. It was _really_ breaking your concentration and ruining the mood. Brick seemed to take note of your frustration, which he secretly found kind of cute.   
  
“I’ve gotcha,” Brick said lowly, one of his massive hands suddenly gathering all your hair away from your face and holding it back in a ponytail. At the same time, he forced your head down further and filled your mouth even more. A soft moan escaped from you, muffled by his cock in your mouth. Brick shuddered again slightly and pleasure burned at the tips of your nerves once again.

You'd never get over how you were able to make a seven foot tall vault hunter rippling with muscles and bristling with guns and weapons shake beneath you. 

Somehow, you couldn’t have possibly imagined how intensely hot it was to have his fingers grip so tightly at your hair. You always knew he had a bit of a thing for pulling at your hair, but he'd never been this close to your scalp before. A bit impatiently, he pushed your head forwards again, making you take more of him into your mouth. A surprised, but not unpleasant moan came from you and he threw his head back, his grip tightening even more, his body becoming stiffer beneath you the more you worked him over. A thin string of drool dropped from your lips.   
  
“Holy fuckkk,” he said, his words slurring slightly as your head bobbed and your fingers slipped back around his shaft to help you out.  
  
Brick was way too huge for you to reach his base, but it still didn’t mean you were going to ignore that area entirely. You picked up speed either way, finding that your jaw was beginning to ache and you were running out of new ways to please him. You already were pretty sure Brick could give better head than you based on your experience with it alone, but it didn't stop you from trying to giving him something to moan about.

Just as you were pretty sure you were about to get him to cum, the door across the room suddenly burst open. You jumped away from him, ass to the floor, swiping an arm across your lips frantically. _Fuck. Fuck fuck._ Brick meanwhile, had slammed a frustrated fist on the arm of the chair, promptly breaking it off.

" _God **dammit**_ ," he practically shouted out, his face still flushed, and not entirely from anger as he went to cover his dick and pull his pants back up. He glared over his shoulder. 

Mordecai stood in the doorway, a half drained tequila bottle in one hand and his rifle trailing in the other. He was clearly shitfaced drunk beyond belief, more than usual actually, but apparently he was still cognitive enough to realize what he'd just intruded on. He let out a practically wheezing laugh, leaning against the door for support.

"Ahhh, always knew... you two w-were doing some _rara_ shit off on the sidelines," he eventually managed to get out between gasps. The tequila bottle went up as he began to drain it. "Here's to not remembering any of this fucking shit, _amigos!_ "

With those very well articulated and put together words, he stumbled past and to the cots a few feet past where he promptly flopped down, with a long, groan, accompanied by another string of words you didn't quite catch. 

Brick meanwhile had hunched over, his elbows on his knees his face buried in his calloused, rough hands as he rubbed profusely at his eyes. He let one of his hands fall down with an almost comical slap to his knee, giving you an intensely frustrated look. God, if you felt this way, you could only imagine how much worse it was for him. 

You cleared your throat and stood up. "I'll just... leave the rest up to you, big guy," you said, giving him a bit of a teasing smile. " _I've_ still got a bandit to catch anyways." 

As you walked past him, he gave your ass a bit of a playful smack. "Don't let me down, doll. Make him swallow blood and teeth." 

"Will do, Brick. Just for you~" 


End file.
